Did you see last week’s episode of Trinny and Susannah Undress the Nation? The dynamic duo had it in for black clothes this time, saying British women wear far too  much black, and that it’s time we stopped. Claiming that they were going to disprove the ‘myth’ that black is slimming and flattering, they took a woman who loves wearing black, and dressed her first in the most shapeless, baggy, sacklike black clothes they could find, and then in a neat little red dress that fitted her perfectly. Surprise, surprise, the red outfit was judged more flattering, but come on ladies, isn’t that cheating just a little bit? I’d totally agree that the black outfit they chose did nothing for their model, but the same thing in red or blue or yellow would have been just as bad, if not worse. If you really think black isn’t slimming or flattering, why not compare two identical outfits in red and black?

What made me laugh even more is that both Trinny and Susannah are often either photographed in the press or appear in their own shows wearing black themselves!
There is absolutely no denying that black is one of the most versatile, chic and flattering colours a woman can wear and that is precisely why we all do! It would have made a lot more sense if Trinny and Susannah had talked more about how to wear black clothes and how to team them up with colours and accessories that will create fabulous outfits.

Whether it’s a classic little black dress or the perfect pair of black trousers, I don’t know a single woman who wouldn’t put something black on the list of clothes that make her feel confident, stylish and yes, slimmer as well. So sorry, Trinny and Susannah, but I don’t think you’re going to banish black any time soon!

Audrey Hepburn’s dress…

One of the black Givenchy dresses made for Hepburn for the film, ‘Breakfast at Tiffany’s’ was sold to an anonymous bidder for a whooping £467,200, far exceeding the £70,000 originally expected.

Yes. Audrey. Hepburn. Givenchy. Dress. £467,200.

That’s for one dress, not two. No freebies thrown in. Not even a copy of the film. Not even a little vial sample of Givenchy perfume.

Marilyn’s ‘Happy Birthday’ dress…

The cost fetched for Hepburn’s dress somewhat pales into the background when compared to how much was paid for the dress Marilyn Monroe wore when she sang ‘Happy Birthday’ to the then U.S. President, J.F Kennedy, at Madison Square Gardens in 1962.

At $1,267,500, Marilyn’s dress went into the Guinness Book of World Records as the most expensive garment ever sold.

A Kitty Hoodie…

Is there really anything to say about this that it’s not saying about itself?

I don’t know whether to laugh …or laugh.

It looks strange, cute and scary - like Batman with seee-rious identity issues.

Upon the sight of this hoodie, cats will run, dogs will whimper, and parking attendants shall quickly cross over to the other side of the road.

It’s definitely making a statement. No doubt about that.

Is that yo’ fat wallet or are ya jus’ happy ta see meh…

In 2007, a pair of traditional Austrian ‘Lederhosen’ (knee-length leather trousers) was sold for 85,000 euros to a German living in Dubai.
This pair was apparently made from wild red deer skin and studded with 166 gold-set diamonds.

Three cheers for Wohlmuther, the Austrian designer who created them – if he can charge that much for them and get away with it, then hurrah to the next rich chump that comes along.

Hamburger Baby…

The first step to being at one with a cheeseburger …is to be at one with a cheeseburger.

Breathe in. Breathe out.

This baby looks way too cute in this outfit. He also looks a bit stuck where he is, like he’s thinking ‘I’ve gotta do some serious rocking back and forth so I can build up the momentum to get up.’

Too cute.

Diamond-encrusted Jeans…

The most expensive pair of jeans was launched at London Fashion Week back in February for a mere £640,000.

The ladies’ jeans - 27 inches at the waist (so only for skinny rich cows, then?) – is encrusted with 15 diamonds (each worth up to £135,000).

The first pair was bought by an ‘anonymous buyer’.

The diamonds are attached to each back pocket, so the wearer would have to be careful every time she used the ladies’ room. Can you imagine if one of those £135k babies fell in the loo??? Not funny.

(But funny)

Mobile phone belt clips…

Who do you think you are? John Wayne?

Oh….. you do.

Well, ah hate ta break t’ya, son, but chu ain’t ever gone be no cowboy. Not even with 3 mobile phones riding your waist.

And with the ear piece you have on, you look like a wanna-be Neo/wanna-be John Wayne/gotta-be-a-loser on Britain’s Got Talent.

Off. Off. Off. Off.

Disney ties…

It’s been *scientifically-proven that men who wear Disney ties were dropped on their heads as children. So, this particular fashion faux-pas IS NOT THEIR FAULT, PEOPLE. Blame Mother.

I’ve written a song for these special, special people:

When you see a guy in a Disney tie
Retract the ‘tut, tuts’, the rolling of the eyes.
Seek within for the love you can give
Paris. Hilton. Elvis. Quiff
(*kinda, sorta. They make great lovers, too.)

Too much make-up…

I can’t see your face, dah-ling. Where’s it gone? Somewhere over the rainbow, you say.

Ha. Very funny.
NOT.
Thanks to the Hansel & Gretel trail you leave in your wake, I know where you live.

Nice flat.

Football t-shirts…

This is obviously a cry for help. Or an invitation to cry along with him. Or both.

The only time you should ever wear a football t-shirt into work is ….well…never.

Not even then.

(p.s: wearing a footie tee under your work shirt is a big no-no, too. DON’T DO IT. Just don’t. I love you too much to KICK YOUR ASS. But I will. If I have to. For the greater good. Queen and Country.)

White socks…

White socks only suit Michael Jackson.
And look what happened to him.

I think there should be a new generation of technically buffed-up, fashion-conscious white socks that are able to scan what a person’s wearing. If the wearer has office drags on, they’d give off a high-pitched Celine Dion shrill. That should do the trick.

But pray, what if the sock offender is a Celine Dion fan?

Then, that’s two offences. Their punishment: her album played backwards. That’s enough to drive anyone crazy.

High-heels…

If a gorgeous pair of Jimmy Choos makes you feel 10 feet tall, then…erm…that’s because they DO make you feel 10 feet tall.

If your head’s touching the ceiling, like you’re in frikkin Alice in Wonderland, then LOSE THE SHOES, PRONTO.

Tone it down to 2-3 inches max. Any higher, then I suggest you join the circus as a stilt walker.

‘Off the mark’ colours…

My eyes, My eyes. I can’t see, Mama, I can’t see.

Uh, oh – it’s neon blue today. Where’s my sunglasses?

If a hot-pink work shirt or tie makes you look like a frikkin anaemic human firefly, then pur-lease put me out of my misery, pretend you’re a stripper and take it off NOW.

(Another damn trip to the optician’s thanks to you. You’re lucky my healthcare covers it. Grrr.)

Image Credits
(img credit: freeparking)
(img credit: cote)
(img credit: Mel B)
(img credit: BC Mom)
(img credit: Xenia Antunes)
(img credit: Katie Tegtmeyer )
(img credit: Malias)

If you thought finding clothes in the right colour and size was tricky enough, get ready for shopping to become altogether more complicated: within a couple of years, scientists say, we could be choosing clothes not just on what they look like, but for what they can do for us. Companies like Philips, Hewlett Packard and Casio are working on ‘wearable technology’, that can turn our clothes into computers, phones, music systems and more, so instead of toting gadgets around with us, we’ll simply wear them.
Want music while you walk? You’ll be able to buy a jacket with a built-in MP3 player. Like to keep in touch? Computer technology embedded into fabric means you could send emails from your coat, via a drop-down keyboard in the cuff. Special fibres could be used to produce clothes that’ll cool you down or warm you up, as required, while with sat nav built into your skirt, you need never get lost again. For the hypochondriacs among us, there’ll be clothing that constantly monitors your heart rate and blood pressure, while paranoid parents can dress the kids in T-shirts with tracking devices (no word yet on whether they’ll be available in adult sizes for straying spouses).
Scientists at Bristol University have even worked on a jacket that can be set to beam out information about the wearer to other people with the same garments, so if you’re eyeing up someone in a bar, for example, your jacket could tune into his and report back that he’s a model railway enthusiast who lives with his mum and sixteen cats. Which should streamline the dating process quite a bit.
It all sounds thrillingly futuristic and Star Trekky, but couldn’t they just have invented clothes that washed, dried and ironed themselves instead? Now that’s what I’d call technology.

Now we’re big fans of catwalk fashion, but you have to wonder sometimes about the designers creations. For every piece of cutting edge style that is unveiled, there also seems to be a equally revolting fashion disaster that leaves unfortunate witnesses shielding their eyes.

We have collected some of the more unfortunate sights ever to (dis)grace the worlds runways. - What were these people thinking?

Coming soon to a fashion store near you: a mirror that gives fashion advice. Yes, I know it sounds like something out of Harry Potter by way of Star Trek, but apparently this reflective replacement for the bored best friend already exists. Called the Magic Mirror, it works by reading tags in the clothes you try on. Stand in front of it in your potential new outfit, and, like your very own shiny, flat Trinny or Susannah, it’ll suggest the perfect accessories to complement the look, and point out where to find them in the store. Slightly disappointingly, it doesn’t actually speak, only displays its tips on a screen, but then again, do you really want to stand in a changing room filled with robotic voices shrilling ‘What that needs is a nice pair of black heels’?

If you’re not sure the colour’s really you, it’ll tell you what other shades the clothes come in. Got the wrong size? It’ll helpfully summon the right one, without taking ten minutes to finish a conversation about how it was, like, really annoyed when Natasha said that, then rolling its eyes and looking you up and down with the words ‘A 12? Yeah, right’ written all over its face. Which makes it one up on most Saturday girls.

 If you need a bit more feedback, it’s also now possible to send live video footage of yourself in your new outfit, through your changing room mirror and straight to the mobile of your best friend, partner or mum, and then to get their comments displayed on the screen. All very 21^st century, I’m sure, but given the chances of unwittingly zapping a shot of myself in a bikini straight to my boss or my bank, I think I’ll be sticking with a message from the mirror.

Have a look at this other article I found in the Daily Mail and see what other mirror marvels are coming to our stores!

His and Hers
One thing is getting matching wedding rings, even his and hers luggage may be acceptable if you’re French. Wearing matching leggings in multi-plaid is not acceptable people! Surely one of the worst trends from the 1970s.

70s Suits
I know it says you can mail the coupon for a free catalog, but that was from the 1970s. Don’t be disappointed, though, because you can find clothes like these at thrift stores that have been hanging around there every since these models took them off!

Sexy 70s Fashion?
Most men probably think this 1970s style is particularly hot. However, women find it to be one of the worst styles because it objectified them. Not to mention, no woman wants a skirt so short her underwear hangs out. Britney Spears would be all over this style, though. Wait, I think she already is.

Big Hair and Sweater Vests
The style of the clothing in this photo is completely overshadowed by the huge hairstyle. Wow, who knew white women could have a fro like that?

The Brady Bunch
How many men these days would be willing to wear a skin tight pair of pants not to mention a white pair of skin tight pants? Mike Brady and at least one of his sons are wearing white pants in this Brady Bunch photo. Here’s hoping white pants for men stay in the 1970s!

Two Toned Shirts
What is up with the white shirt with dark collar and cuffs? This is a horrendous style that couldn’t have stayed popular too long. At least hopefully that was the case!

Funky Shoes
These shoes are certainly funky and overall they are just ugly!

Slack Suits
The huge collar and super high cuffs on this shirt is just overbearing. It makes the suit look feminine. The solid color is pretty bad, too. I don’t know which style on this slack suit is worse, but the whole ensemble should stay in the past.

Montgomery Ward’s Fashion Magazine
Check out the different fashions that were offered in this 1976 edition of Montgomery Ward’s magazine. You will see some styles that are just awful, especially the super high waisted pants and that canary yellow ensemble towards the end. Wow!

Knit Jump Suit
Just the name of this makes it sound awful, but seeing it in person shows you how bad it really is. Add the two tone suit and this guy looks like a joker in every sense of the word!

High Heels for Men
Are you kidding? These are high heel shoes for men! Sure the likes of Tom Cruise are hoping for this style to make a comeback, but the average sized men and taller are cursing the idea that men should wear high heels…. Ever!

Is this a Suit?
This guy looks like he is going to be hanging out in the house, but this is really a suit. This truly adds a new twist to “Big Pimpin”. Seriously….

White Pin Striped Vest Suit
There should be no vest suits. But, to make matters worse, the ‘70s had white pinstriped vest suits with belts. Oh, this trend is horrendous and just looking at this photo is hysterical.

Paisley Jumpsuit
Both paisleys and jumpsuits were popular in the 1970s. Both were a big mistake!

There are of course many other ‘70s fashions that should stay in that decade, but they are beginning to make a comeback. These include high waisted paints, shift dresses, and more. What goes around comes around so don’t be too shocked if you see any of the styles posted here hanging in your local retail store one day soon!

Japan has always been on the edge when it comes to hairstyles and clothing; however the styles that are popular now are very strange to Westerners. That’s because many of them are theme based, like the Sweet Lolita style that is basically like dressing like a five-year-old girl complete with teddy bear. Then, there are the other styles that are more functional, like the skirt that turns into a vending machine. Of all the styles that are popular in Japan right now you will notice some of the most popular are platform shoes, lots of makeup, and dark tans. Be sure to check out each photo in detail to see the strange hairstyles and accessories that go along with these looks.

Vending Machine Skirt
Yes, seriously, this does exist. The point is to have this clothing on so in case you are targeted for a rape/mugging or some other violent crime you can simply turn yourself into a vending machine. I’m not sure how long it takes to transform and if someone is chasing you how that all plays out. But, if you are interested in a skirt that turns into a vending machine there is one available.

Sewer Cover Purse
The point of this purse is not style. It is to ward off would-be thieves who want your purse. I guess you act like you are going to hit them with it… Or, maybe in the dark it isn’t so obvious that you have all kinds of things inside this bag and a small Japanese woman could actually fool a would-be attacker into thinking she is just carrying this sewer cover along for protection.

Glow in the Dark
Clothes that glow in the dark would have been super cool in 7th grade. But for adults? I’m not so sure. Maybe it does look cool while dancing in a dark and crowded club. Or maybe it just looks, well, weird.

Very Colorful
This is certainly a very colorful outfit. The look is quite popular in Japan, though.

Origami Dress Anyone?
This dress looks like some kind of mixture of origami and a napkin at a fine restaurant.

Japanese or Austrian?
Apparently this new Japanese style called Sweet Lolita is all the rage. But, it doesn’t look Japanese at all and it really looks like something straight out of the Sound of Music!

Goth/Punk Attire
What are those? Lace up leg warmers? Also, what is the girl on the left wearing on her head? Is that a hat? And why is the girl on the right going to such effort to dress gothic while wearing a super conservative jacket?

Gothic Lolita

These girls really walk around like this. The goal is to be gothic yet feminine. An interesting mix.

Gothic Guys

Is he wearing a corset? The black lipstick certainly matches his attire, but that’s about all it does.

Strawberry Shortcake

This seriously looks like Strawberry Shortcake to me. But, it is all part of that Sweet Lolita style going on in Japan.

Present Day Japan or 1800s Southern USA?

I think this came from the set of “Gone With the Wind”. But these frilly umbrellas are very popular with the sweet Lolita trend.

PVC and Lace Gloves

These gloves are made of PVC and lace. How sexy?!?

Bondage Pants

Every man needs his very own pair of bondage pants complete with a million zippers!

Color Coordinated

From her hair to her toes she is color coordinated. It is kind of like Punk Little House on the Prairie.

Little Girl Inspired

Check out her hair! As if the poufy dress, teddy bear and the little girl socks weren’t enough! Teddy bears have become popular accessories with women dressing in this style.

Blue/Red Hair

Blue hair, blue makeup, PVC dress, dreads. What’s not to like?

Vinyl

I think everything they are wearing is vinyl!

Ganguro Girl

This is another Japanese style that is popular. It is called Ganguro and it is not to be confused with Yamanba. This style is also all about dark tans, blonde hair, and the Barbie style. The tans and makeup are in stark contrast to one another. Notice the platform shoes and short shorts.